The Genesis

In the beginning, and all that. look, i want to start off by saying that i still have no clue where i am going in life right now. i do know a few facts though so let me lay those on out. First is that my girlfriend is pregnant, and its not my kid biologically. I am a 65 year old male who has a pretty bad record on almost every front. I love Del Taco and i cant stand the fact that i am sleeping on my grandpas couch and floor. my girlfriend has a car so for that i am very glad. she and i get along alright and i am very attracted to her. i hope she can shed the baby fat pretty quickly. i just got a job delivering flowers in la jolla. i am currently typing this and emily is reading it while i type. she is listening to some tarrot stuff on youtube which impresses me but i wont get into why on here right now. maybe i will get into that sometime way later if i continue to write.

i do not feel that i am a talented writer, i do have a lot to say though so i will type. i am not quite sure how this website works but from what i have read and seen, it seems really cool. i am a noob to alot of the online community and i dont know a while lot about anything but i am willing to be taught and i really would like help from anyone that knows more than i do. there have been a few influences in my life that have really shaped me directly and i will get into that eventually but i say this so that i can throw some stuff out there about what i believe. not really who i am per se but it should give the reader some insight to my decision making process. I was raised mormon and my religious explorations spans from peter priesthood, trying to marry molly mormon, to some very in depth luciferian studies. needless to say i dont buy a whole lot of bull shit from anyone especially clergy haha. i have some beliefs that are not easy to put into words and some of the ones that i can put into words are so weird that if i just wrote them out for you right here you would have to put this down and never read my shit again. and i wouldnt blame you. so trust me when i say that when we get into my spirituality it will be a discussion that should last maybe a couple weeks.

i really want to cover everything in these posts. i like to talk about politics and drugs and sex. all have had fundamental roles in the development of the matthew that you guys are now being introduced to. I think that in order for me to talk candidly and honestly you need to understand me a little but right? so i guess this is the first post, i will get to the meat and potatoes quickly on the next post