In the course of some 30 years and change in the helping professions, one of the constants that has run through virtually every consultation I have undertaken is that the person at hand is (ultimately) just looking to find a measure of Inner Peace.
It is inevitable that life will have its ups and downs, of course. But after a while, feeling like you're living in a constant state of chaos feels exhausting and all you really want is to have a moment of peace and respite.
But finding true inner peace can be a very elusive goal, and the pursuit of it is often complicated by the fact that people discover that there is no "magic pill," and — moreover — it is actually a lot of work to obtain inner peace.
Sadly, for many it means that the journey ends with some kind of declaration that they "just don't have the time and energy" needed to go through the process.
Of course, there is no single formula for finding inner peace. And it's not a thing you can "have" or "own;" it's more of a thing that simply manifests as a result of putting together a certain sequence of events and actions in your life.
My husband, for example, finds his inner peace sitting on a rock or log on the beach, just watching the ocean and the waves break while meditating. That's his way... and it might feel meaningless or like time wasting to someone else.
There are lots of possibilities, from actual meditation, to vigorously working out. One client found her moments of peace by furiously riding a stationary bike at the gym for 30 minutes; might sound like torture to some, but she felt she could be alone with just her breath and her heartbeat.
In a more general sort of sense, one of the best things we can do is establish good personal boundaries. It's an effecive preventive measure that can keep us from getting in over our heads, to begin with.
Many of the clients I counsel who are stuggling with a chaotic world — which makes them want to find some inner peace — have issues with loose personal boundaries. For example, they might allow toxic personalities too much time in their lives, and they might not be very good at saying "no" to requests they really have no business taking on.
It's not always easy to stand firm with what you need — and you might feel pressured to relent — but it's important. Family, friends and even superiors at work can be very manipulative, and may even try to make it feel like it is your fault that you will not constantly be at their beck and call.
At the moment, I am getting a lot of distressed messages from people who are reaching "boiling point" over the situation in the world. Much of the time, the problem is actually that they are feeding themselves a constant "diet"of fear and anxiety from reading news reports and watching podcasts online.
It's very important to remember that you cannot control what is happening in the world, no matter how much it distresses you, you can only control how you respond to it.
Society often pressures us to "stay informed," but it's usually a better approach to limit your exposure to so-called "fear scrolling." Just step away from the stream of distressing news, unless it is somehow required by your work.
In the end, we must recognize that having Inner Peace is something that requires effort, pretty much every day! You have to make a conscious choice to first identify, and then to step aside from the sources of your distress. Simply going forward and "trying to deal with it" will not work!
So, here's wishing you a more peaceful journey through a turbulent world!
Thanks for visiting my blog today, and Bright Blessings to all!
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