Feeling awkward and tense when facing change is normal, whether it's big or small. It's not just about fear of the unknown. Adults have often gone through changes that made things worse rather than better.
For example, you might change jobs because of a toxic boss or coworkers. Yet, the new place could have an even worse work environment. After such experiences, it’s natural to become more hesitant about change, fearing it will cause more problems.
Although change and uncertainty are unavoidable, we control how we respond to them. Cognitive neuroscientist Maya Shankar suggests asking yourself three questions when resisting change:
How can change enhance my skills? When we think about change, we tend to believe we'll react the same way as before. We assume our personality stays the same. But facing difficulties and new situations can make us grow and develop new skills.
How can change influence my values? Unexpected changes can reshape how we see our lives and what we care about most. They can make us realize what truly matters.
How can change redefine my identity? Sudden changes can shake the basis of who we are and what we do. But they can also help us find a stronger, more stable sense of ourselves.
This isn't about ignoring the negative impacts or pretending everything is fine. The goal is to be open to internal growth. Reflect on how adapting to uncertainty can help you in the future.